Put the Devil into Hell

The guys learn some history on Halloween night.

“Hutch, listen to this.”

“What?”

“This Ripley’s book of Halloween trivia I borrowed from Huggy talks about the origins of the phrase, “Things that go bump in the night.”

“And?”

“Well, I just thought it was interesting. It says that the phrase can be traced back to an English prayer around the turn of the century.”

“So it’s not very old then.”

“No, I guess not.”

Starsky flips the page and reads the next passage with great interest.

“You are not gonna believe this! It says that in the middle ages, witches brooms were used as phallic symbols, and the witches brew they boiled in their cauldrons was a hallucinogenic ointment that they inserted into their…well, you know…using the broomstick handle.”

“Oh come on, Starsk, you’re putting me on!”

“No I’m not. Read it yourself.”

Starsky shoves the book into Hutch’s hands and watches as Hutch’s eyes grow wide as they skim the page.

“You know, Starsk…,” Hutch begins, putting the book down and trailing his fingers lightly down his lover’s cheek. He tickles the curve of Starsky’s neck with his fingertips and when he reaches the dark, wiry chest hairs, he twines them seductively. “I think we should turn out the lights and go bump in the night ourselves. I believe we’ve even got some magic ointment in the nightstand, sans hallucinogens, of course.”

Starsky grasps a handful of blond hair and whispers in his partner’s ear. “I don’t need any hallucinogens to make me feel like I’m flyin’, because I feel like that whenever I’m with you.”

Hutch reaches over and turns out the light, and then slides his hand across the smooth curve of Starsky’s hip, pulling him closer. “Come here, you sexy devil.”

###

As the well-worn mattress plays its symphony of squeaks and creaks to the lovers’ dance of passion, the two men never hear the mysterious thumping sounds coming from within the walls.

-The End-

Or is it?