When Hope Runs Out

Hutch doesn’t believe Starsky will live.

What happens to Hutch when his hope runs out? Set between the episode end and the tag. Written for the SHFF photo prompt – write a story including the Dobeys.

Chapter One

“Detective Hutchinson?…Detective Hutchinson?”

Hutch turned slowly to face the speaker; a doctor, who was looking at him with a mixture of concern and encouragement.

“Detective Hutchinson?”

“Mmm…yes.”

Even to Hutch’s own ears he sounded exhausted and only half present. Maybe that was because half of him wanted to be somewhere else, somewhere where he didn’t have to watch his partner dying. The other half couldn’t leave; not as long as his partner might need him. Massive damage. The words echoed around his head.

“Detective Hutchinson?”

Hutch tried to focus. He gave a nod to show he was listening.

“I thought you’d like to know that we’re greatly encouraged by the latest tests and we’ll be moving Detective Starsky out of critical care and onto the Cardio Ward.”

“Huh…” Hutch tried to grasp what he was being told. “H-He’s doing better?”

He turned to look at the still figure lying in the hospital bed, face almost as white as the sheet that lightly covered him, tubes sticking out of every place a tube could connect to. There wasn’t much evidence of a change. He turned back to the doctor, looking doubtful.

“He’s really doing better?”

“Yes, much better. His pulse is strong and steady. He’s breathing on his own. We’ve been able to take him off the strongest of the pain meds we were using. He should start to spend more time awake soon.”

Hutch looked at Starsky’s face with mild surprise and some confusion. When had the doctors taken him off the machine that had been helping him to breathe? Hutch hadn’t moved from this chair in hours and he didn’t remember seeing them do it. The doctor came closer and laid a hand on Hutch’s shoulder. Hutch looked up at him, confused by the gesture. He didn’t need care; Starsky did.

“Your friend is doing much better. I think now would be a good time for you to go home and get some sleep.” Before Hutch could attempt to protest, he added, “Especially as there are reinforcements here to take your place.”

Hutch turned to look where the doctor was indicating and was surprised to see both Dobey and Huggy standing just outside. The doctor beckoned and they both came in.

“Hey, my blond brother,” Huggy said very softly. “How about I watch over Curly for a while? Edith wants you to go over to their house so that she can feed you up. Hospital cafeteria food won’t give no-one the strength they need.”

Hutch wanted to say, “My place is here. My partner needs me. I have to be here in case he wakes up,” but he was too tired to form the words. When Huggy held out a hand, he allowed himself to be pulled to his feet but it didn’t stop him from looking at Starsky guiltily.

“Come on, son,” Dobey said, taking his elbow and gently guiding him to the door. “Huggy will call if there’s any change and we can’t keep Edith waiting, can we?”

Hutch hesitated and looked at Huggy. “You’ll call?”

“I’ll call. Cross my heart.”

Hutch gazed at his partner for a moment more. While he had no energy to say anything to Starsky, he also had no energy to protest against being made to leave. The bottom line was he had no energy. He couldn’t remember when he’d ever felt so tired. Stifling a yawn and nearly tripping over his feet with exhaustion, Hutch allowed Dobey to steer him to the elevators and then down to the parking lot.

“Why don’t you rest a little while I drive us home?” Dobey suggested, once they were in the car.

Hutch nodded and closed his eyes. He was asleep before they’d even left the hospital grounds.

Dobey glanced at his exhausted officer with concern. Starsky had seemingly turned a corner. The induced coma that he had been in had done the trick, allowing his body time to start healing. The doctors were confident that Starsky was going to make it. Hutch on the other hand had finally run out of adrenaline and had spent hours of the last two days just staring at nothing.

Dobey wondered how long the ‘crash and burn’ that had happened might last. Would it permanently affect Hutch? He’d never seen his officer looking so tired. He really hoped that some time away from the hospital and a touch of Edith’s tender loving care might help rejuvenate Hutch. He was extremely worried about him, especially as he knew that Hutch hadn’t begun to deal with what he’d had to witness.

Hutch had avoided talking about what had happened that day in the police parking lot. Instead, the detective had thrown himself into making sure James Gunther and every member of his whole rotten organisation ended up behind bars. However, once the arrest had been made, Hutch had nothing to focus on to keep him going. He couldn’t help his partner and seemed crippled by lethargy. He just sat by Starsky’s bed side, waiting. It seemed like he couldn’t do anything until his partner woke up and, apart from a very brief period of wakefulness, Starsky had been mainly unconscious.

Up until a day ago, Dobey thought he was going to lose them both; Starsky to his injuries, Hutch to shock and grief. But Starsky was doing better. Now everyone who cared about them both had to make sure that Hutch recovered his spirits. Dobey swallowed hard. Somehow, somewhere, these two young detectives had become more than just men under his command; they had become like sons. He couldn’t bear the thought of losing either of them.

They’d reached home. Dobey pulled the car to a stop and hesitated. He almost didn’t want to turn off the engine and disturb Hutch’s sleep but he knew the young man would get more rest in a proper bed and that he needed to eat something nutritious too. He turned the key and silence descended.

It only took a second before Hutch was sitting bolt upright and looking around in confusion.

“Where?…What?”

Dobey placed a hand on his arm. “Son, we’ve arrived at my house. You’re going to eat something and rest. Huggy’s keeping an eye on Starsky so he’s in good hands…but don’t tell Huggy I said that.”

Hutch looked at him blankly for a moment then gave a small smile. He wiped at his face with his hands, trying to wake himself up. Dobey climbed out of the car and Hutch followed. Before they reached it the door was opened by Edith. She pulled Hutch into an embrace.

“Come on into the kitchen. The children are already in bed so it’ll be nice and quiet. I’ve got some dinner waiting for you both.”

“Thank you.”

Hutch followed Edith into the kitchen and sat down wearily at the table. Dobey came in a few moments after and sat down beside Hutch just as his wife served their meals.

“Thank you, Edith, this looks delicious,” Dobey said and Edith smiled.

The aroma coming from the home-cooked meal made Hutch realise he was quite hungry. He nodded his thanks and picked up his cutlery. Edith poured herself a coffee and sat down with the men, quietly telling them about her day. Hutch appeared to be listening but concentrated on his food. Dobey and Edith exchanged looks; they were pleased to see him eat. It wasn’t with gusto exactly but it was with a steady appreciation.

Edith waited until the end of the meal to ask for an update on Starsky. Her husband repeated what the doctor had told them and she let out a long breath.

“Oh that is good news.”

Hutch lifted his head and murmured, “Yeah…I should probably go back to him now.”

Edith reached across the table and took Hutch’s hand in hers.

“Ken. David is in safe hands. Huggy is staying with him so you can get some proper rest…If Starsky were able to say it, he would say ‘Get some rest, partner’. It’s okay to have a night off.”

Hutch’s eyes filled with tears. He slowly nodded.

“Let me show you, your bed.”

Edith led him out into the hallway and up the stairs to what was usually Cal’s bedroom.

At Hutch’s look of enquiry, she said, “Cal’s camping in his father’s den and more than happy to do so. I’ve left you some towels and Huggy gave me a bag of fresh clothes for you. Get some sleep, my dear.”

She kissed Hutch on the cheek and then closed the door softly behind her.

Hutch wiped a hand across his face and then investigated the bag of clothes. He found some things to wear in bed and got changed as quickly as he could, feeling the last of his energy slipping away. Then he crawled into the bed and turned off the bedside light. He felt his body become heavy and allowed himself to drift off to sleep.

*****

He awoke to darkness and silence. Where am I? Why am not at the hospital?

Oh.

Sharp pain hit him in the chest, memory pierced his brain. The tearing of metal. The staccato roaring of bullets. Someone screaming out Starsky’s name. Starsky. Starsky on the ground. Unmoving, Blood beginning to pool. Hutch couldn’t move, couldn’t go to his partner. Concrete encased his feet. He couldn’t move. Starsky needed him and he couldn’t move. He hadn’t protected his partner. Starsky was down and so, so still.

Starsky’s dying and there ain’t nothing anyone can do about it.

Starsky was going to die – no!

Chapter Two

“Mumma. Can I go see if Uncle Ken is awake?”

Edith looked over at her eager daughter, glanced over at the clock on the kitchen wall, and then looked back. She nodded.

“I guess that would be all right. Remember to knock before you go in. If he’s still asleep, leave him. If he’s awake, ask him if he wants coffee.”

Rosie nodded and happily trotted out of the kitchen and up the stairs. She paused outside Cal’s room and listened then tapped gently. There was no answer. Feeling disappointed, she started to turn away then stopped. For some reason she decided she would just take a peek and check on Uncle Ken.

She opened the door just a little and peered in. Hutch’s eyes were open but he was still in bed and was staring at the ceiling. She pushed the door open a little wider and stepped inside the room.

“Uncle Ken. Mumma wants to know if you’d like some coffee.”

Hutch didn’t answer. He didn’t seem to notice she was there. Rosie went up to the bed.

“Uncle Ken? Are you feeling okay?”

Hutch stared blankly ahead at nothing. Rosie started to feel a little scared, but she didn’t know why. She patted Hutch’s arm and said, “You stay there. I’m going to get Mumma.”

Quickly, she ran out of the room and down the stairs. Edith looked around from doing the washing up.

“Rosie, I’ve told you before; don’t run in the house.”

“Mumma. There’s something wrong with Uncle Ken!”

“What? What do you mean?”

Rosie looked at Edith helplessly. Edith wiped her hands dry and followed her daughter back up to Cal’s room. She hurried over to Hutch and took his hand in hers.

“Ken. Ken, can you hear me?”

There was no response.

“What’s wrong with him?” Rosie whispered.

“I don’t know, dear. I’m going to ring our doctor and your father. Why don’t you-”

“I’ll stay here. Someone needs to stay with Uncle Ken so he doesn’t feel lonely.”

Edith smiled. “All right, dear. You’re such a good girl. I won’t be long.”

As her mother hurried away, Rosie looked at Hutch and wondered how she could help. She nodded to herself and then carefully climbed onto the bed next to him and snuggled in to his side with her head on his shoulder.

“Uncle Ken, everything’s going to be all right. I figure you’re missing Uncle Dave but we can go see him later if you want to. Mumma says he’s going to be all right. I’m glad about that. I love Uncle Dave…I love you too…Maybe when you’re both feeling better we could go to the zoo. That would be fun, wouldn’t it?”

Hutch didn’t respond but Rosie just wrapped an arm across his middle and held him tight.

*****

Everything was white. Hutch felt like there should be more colour in the world, but maybe that depended on where he was. Maybe white was all there was in this place. He wished he knew. He tried to speak, tried to think. Half-formed words danced in his head and disappeared into the snow coloured world he was trapped in.

Isn’t there something I…? Isn’t there someone who…? Where is this…? Shouldn’t I be…?

He couldn’t utter the questions, let alone come up with a coherent answer. He felt frightened and alone. Alone. That wasn’t right. He had a… Person? Pal?…Partner? Partner, yes, a partner. He tried to hold on to the word but it drifted away again.

Unexpectedly, he felt warmth down one side of his body. He wanted to turn to see what was causing it but still couldn’t move. But the white around him seemed less cold.

He heard voices in the distance but couldn’t make out what they were saying. Then the warmth began to leave him.

Don’t go.

*****

“Rosie, come out of the way so the doctor can look at your Uncle Ken,” Dobey said gently.

Reluctantly, the young girl crawled off the bed and went and stood with her parents while the doctor started checking Hutch’s vital signs.

“Edith, why don’t you take Rosie-?”

“-No, Daddy. Uncle Ken feels better when I’m around. I’m going to stay with him until he’s better or until Uncle Dave can visit.”

Dobey exchanged glances with Edith, who nodded slightly. He rested a hand on Rosie’s shoulder, pleased that he had such a caring daughter but also scared in case whatever was going on with Hutch became something no child should have to handle.

All of them waited impatiently as the doctor ran through his examination. Finally he pulled his stethoscope from his ears and said, “His vital signs are surprisingly good. I think this is some sort of shock induced withdrawal. Has he been through a traumatic event recently?”

Dobey huffed a shaky half-laugh. “You could say that. He saw his partner gunned down…but he seemed to be coping as well as he could very soon afterwards.”

“I see…Well, I’m afraid this is not exactly my field of expertise and I think he needs to go into hospital for monitoring. It could be he will come out of this state by himself but then again he may need some help.”

“Can’t we look after him, Daddy?”

The doctor shook his head. “I’m afraid not, my dear. You’ve done a good job of keeping him company so far but I think he needs specialist care now.” Rosie looked dubious and the doctor smiled at her. “Why don’t you keep him company until the ambulance comes?”

Rosie nodded and climbed back up next to Hutch as the adults left the room to call for an ambulance and arrange whatever else needed to be arranged. Rosie positioned herself next to Hutch’s ear and took one hand in hers. She held it tightly.

“Uncle Ken? I know you must be very tired, too tired to talk…and you’re worried about Uncle Dave…but I’m gonna stay with you. The doctors are going to look after you and make you all better but till then you got me. You don’t need to say anything, just hold my hand and rest.”

Rosie began to stroke Hutch’s cheek very gently while still holding on to his hand with her other one.

*****

The warm feeling returned, not so defined but there. This time Hutch felt as if his face was being touched and he heard a soft whisper beside him. He couldn’t make out the words but someone was definitely there; a kind someone, someone who didn’t demand anything from him, someone who was just there bringing him comfort. He wanted to speak but he couldn’t.

Why can’t I move my head? Or lips? Or feet? Or hands? Or fingers?

Fingers! As he thought about them, he thought he felt a loosening of the white room’s hold on his fingers. He tried to move them. One hand felt as if it was held immobile but the other felt like it was being held by something soft and yielding. He tried desperately to wiggle his fingers.

The soft voice in his ear made happy sounds.

Someone was there. If only they could lead him from this place so he could get back…get back to…St…Starsky! He felt a wave of misery crash through him. Starsky was dying. He was too late to help him.

“Ssh. Don’t cry,” he heard the whispered words. “It’s all going to be okay.”

He wished he could believe the soft voice and escape the misery that was running through him. At least the room around him seemed to be melting and changing and gaining more colour. He tried again to move his fingers and felt a comforting squeeze.

*****

Rosie watched Hutch’s face for any sign of change. She continued to stroke his face and squeeze his hand. She thought she felt his fingers move but as nothing else had changed she figured she was imagining things. Then she saw a tear trickle down his cheek.

“Ssh. Don’t cry. It’s all going to be okay.”

Rosie felt Hutch’s fingers move again and gently squeezed them. She turned away a little so she could shout without aiming her voice directly at her Uncle Ken. “Mumma!!”

She heard rapid footsteps on the staircase and her parents hurried into the room.

“Mumma. Uncle Ken moved his fingers.”

Her parents looked at her doubtfully.

“He did. And he started crying.”

They drew closer and could see the tracks of a few tears on Hutch’s face.

“I’ll send the doctor back up,” Dobey said. “Rosie, you are a very special little girl.”

Rosie beamed and then resumed stroking Hutch’s face and whispering in his ear.

*****

Dobey followed the ambulance to the hospital. Rosie had only let him leave her behind on the condition that she was allowed to visit Hutch later that day. Both he and Edith knew their daughter could be very determined when she put her mind to it. He smiled to himself. Rosie was definitely taking after her mother; Edith could be a very determined person as well.

He parked in the hospital parking lot and made his way through to admitting. While Hutch had earlier appeared to be responding a little to voices and touch, he had still not looked at anything or anyone directly. He wasn’t catatonic anymore but he wasn’t fully aware of what was going on around him either. He had responded to directions and had been able to walk out of the house, supported by one of the paramedics. Dobey had taken that as a good sign.

Dobey knew that the doctors would want to admit him for a psychiatric evaluation and he wasn’t sure whether he should fight it on Hutch’s behalf or not. The doctor’s knew more about traumatic stress than he did and how best to care for Hutch, but his gut was telling him that the thing Hutch needed most was Starsky and to believe that his partner was going to make it. He waited outside while the doctors ran their initial tests, but let them know he was there and wanted to speak to whichever doctor took charge of Hutch’s examination. Finally, a doctor appeared and took Dobey to one side.

“I’m Doctor Edson. I think Detective Hutchinson is suffering from extreme fatigue and traumatic stress. I was wondering if you could fill me in a little on what’s been happening in his life recently? I know that being a police officer must be stressful but something out of the ordinary must have happened for him to be this disengaged with what’s going on around him.”

Dobey went to speak but the doctor stopped him.

“Let’s go along to my office, Captain. We’ll be more comfortable there and won’t get interrupted.”

He led the way to his office and invited Dobey to sit on one of the chairs in front of his desk. The doctor took out his notebook and pen and looked intently at Dobey.

Dobey took a deep breath and then explained about the wide-reaching case that the two detectives had been working on, the ambush in the parking lot and that Hutch had gone into shock straight after the incident but then had worked unceasingly to bring the men responsible to justice whilst also keeping watch over his partner. He explained how all the people that cared about Hutch had started to get worried about him because he wasn’t sleeping or eating properly.

The doctor nodded. “I see. Run me through what happened this morning.”

Dobey went through the details and then said, “He did seem to respond to my daughter…and…well, I’m no expert on this, I know you are, but…Hutchinson and Starsky are as close as brothers. They are family to each other. I think if Starsky could talk to him, it might help…Of course I don’t know how Starsky is doing today, I haven’t had chance to see him.”

The doctor looked thoughtful.

“Let me see if I can arrange for Detective Hutchinson to go and spend some time with his partner today. In the meantime, I will admit him to a private room under Psychiatric Care.” Edson saw Dobey’s grimace and added reassuringly, “We have different levels of care up on the seventh floor. Detective Hutchinson will be under my supervision but will not be in the locked down section. He will be allowed visitors in line with normal hospital policy and it would totally appropriate for you and your family to visit as much as you like, especially if Detective Hutchinson finds your little girl a source of comfort. She may well be his way back into a world that he is finding overwhelming at the moment.”

Dobey breathed a sigh of relief, grateful that the doctor seemed kind, intelligent and had a good share of common sense.

“When Detective Hutchinson comes out of his trance-like state, I would suggest he seeks regular counselling to make sure that this doesn’t happen again.”

Dobey nodded and stood up. “I’ll make sure he does. Thank you, Doctor Edson.”

They shook hands and the doctor led him to the door.

“Why don’t you visit your other Detective while I get Detective Hutchinson settled? That should only take an hour and then visiting will be allowed.”

“Thank you.”

Chapter Three

Dobey walked briskly along the corridor to the elevator and made his way to the Cardio Ward so that he could see Starsky. When he walked into his room, he was pleasantly surprised to see Starsky was just waking up.

“H-Hu-utch.”

“It’s me, Captain Dobey. Good to see you awake, Starsky.”

Starsky coughed and Dobey reached for the cup of water on the table and held it so Starsky could drink from it. Starsky was still in a weak state and Dobey found he had a huge lump in his throat when he thought about how close they had come to losing him.

“Where’s Hutch?”

The voice asking was raspy and at half-strength but the look in Starsky’s eyes was familiar. Dobey gave thanks that Starsky really did seem to be healing.

“I sent him to get some rest. He’s been here nearly twenty-four-seven. Huggy and I have tried to relieve him when he let us but you know what he’s like when you’re in the hospital.”

Starsky smiled slightly and nodded.

Just then a doctor and nurse came in and Dobey was ushered out while they ran through their tests. He waited and then headed back in as soon as he was allowed.

On his way out the doctor said what he had already told Starsky, “Real signs of improvement. I’m very hopeful there will be a complete recovery eventually.”

Dobey pulled a handkerchief from his pocket and wiped at his face as he sat down next to Starsky. Starsky was still awake. He looked tired but also restless.

As Dobey put his handkerchief back, Starsky asked, “How bad is it?”

Dobey looked at him, trying to decide how much to say. “You’ve had us quite worried but the doctors sound confident now.”

“I can’t remember how long I’ve been here. I can’t remember what h-happ…Oh, I remember Hutch shouting. I remember freezing. I remember hitting the ground…I think I remember waking up from surgery.” Starsky coughed and Dobey helped him have a sip of water. “I think I remember seeing Hutch dancing…but that can’t be right?…I remember being in and out of it then I think I must have slept until just now.” He looked at Dobey. “That about right? How many times was I hit?”

“Three bullets. One was a through and through in your side. One nicked your heart and punctured your lung. The last one lodged near your spine.”

Starsky’s eyes widened with alarm and Dobey patted his arm reassuringly.

“You’ve made the surgeons earn their money, that’s for sure. You coded once after surgery but they got you back. Then you were in a coma for a couple of days. Then you were awake briefly but your body couldn’t cope with trying to heal and keeping everything else going so they had to put you in an induced coma. As to Hutch dancing? That must have been the first time you woke up. He took it badly when they said they needed to induce a coma so your body didn’t have to work so hard while you were healing. It was hard for him just sitting here watching you…Hard for all of us. Anyway, you’ve been unconscious for a week but today they decided you were strong enough to breathe on your own and come off the strongest pain meds.”

Starsky let out a breath. Nervously he asked, “How long? How long till I get back to normal?…Will I get back to normal?”

Dobey nodded and stated firmly, “Yes, son, you will. It’s going to be a long road but you know your friends will be with you every step of the way.”

Starsky closed his eyes, exhausted from the conversation and the knowledge of what had happened. He also wanted to hide the tears that were threatening to spill. He must have dozed off because he came awake abruptly to find Dobey was still there.

“Hutch? Did Hutch get hit? Is he okay?”

“He didn’t get hit.”

Dobey hesitated for only half a second but it was enough to alarm Starsky.

“Tell me what’s going on with Hutch.”

“He’s exhausted. Between putting the case to bed and spending every other minute here watching over you, he’s burnt himself out…and seeing you gunned down like that affected him deeply. He froze straight after. It was like he thought you were already dead and to be honest it was touch and go. He started talking like he’d given up hope.”

Starsky swallowed. “Is he going to be okay? Did you make him go home?”

“Not exactly…Yesterday, after the doctors took you off the breathing apparatus and started to wake you up, Huggy, Edith and I decided we needed to get him away from here to get some rest and to make sure he was eating properly. Huggy came and sat with you and I took Hutch to my house. He was exhausted but he managed to eat something. Then he went to bed. When he wasn’t awake before I left for the precinct, I was relieved, thought he was finally catching up on his sleep.” Dobey wiped a hand over his face. “This morning, Rosie found him awake but not responding to anything.”

“Delayed shock?”

“Something like that. He’s been admitted to the psych ward.” Dobey quickly added, “Doctor Edson seems to know what he’s doing. He wants Hutch in for monitoring but he is allowed visitors and he said that he’d try to arrange for Hutch to be brought to see you.”

Starsky tried to sit up. “Take me to him!”

Dobey stood and placed a gentle hand on Starsky’s shoulder. “Son, you just sit tight and heal. If you promise me you won’t move, I’ll go see if Hutch can be brought here sooner rather than later.”

Starsky sighed but nodded. He knew he didn’t have the strength to go anywhere, plus he was still hooked up to machines. The spirit might be willing but the flesh was very weak indeed.

“Okay. I’ll sit still, but I need to see him.”

Dobey nodded and left the room.

Starsky stared at the door and whispered to himself, “Oh Hutch, buddy, what have I put you through? I’m so sorry.”

*****

Dobey made his way up to the nurses’ station on the seventh floor and enquired as to where Hutch was and whether arrangements had been made to let him visit his partner. A nurse went to find Doctor Edson and they both returned a moment later.

“Captain Dobey, how did you find your other detective?”

“He’s alert and anxious to see his partner. Can I take Hutchinson to see him?”

Edson nodded. “Yes, let’s see how Detective Hutchinson is now. He was becoming more responsive when I checked on him a few minutes ago. Nurse Deveraux, please could arrange for a wheelchair to be brought to room ten.”

“Of course, Doctor Edson.”

Dobey followed Edson along the corridor and into the room. He was pleased to see Hutch turn to look at the door when they entered but he gave no sign of recognition of either of them. Doctor Edson walked up to the side of the bed and tapped Hutch gently on the shoulder.

“Detective Hutchinson, you have a visitor. Your captain, Captain Dobey.”

Dobey moved closer and into Hutch’s line of sight.

“How are you doing, son?”

Hutch frowned at him but there was a hint of recognition.

“Captain? Where am I?”

“You’re in the hospital.”

Hutch looked around the room in confusion. “Hospital? Why?”

“Yes, hospital…You were at my house last night. Do you remember?”

Hutch shook his head.

“This morning we found you awake but not responding to anything. It was probably caused by a mixture of exhaustion and delayed shock.”

“Shock? From what?”

Dobey looked at Edson before speaking. Edson nodded, indicating that Dobey should carry on.

“Do you remember what happened just under two weeks ago? Do you remember Starsky being shot?”

Hutch swallowed. “Sh-shot? Starsky?”

“Yes.”

“When? How? Where was I?” Hutch suddenly took in a deep breath and groaned with pain. “They shot Starsky. He’s dying. He’s not gonna make it. I couldn’t protect him!”

Dobey squeezed Hutch’s arm. “Hutch?…Son, are you listening to me?”

Hutch turned a grief-stricken face towards his captain.

“Dave is alive.”

Hutch looked at him without comprehension.

“Son, did you hear what I said? Dave is alive and he’s going to make it. He’s in a hospital bed downstairs and he wants to see you.”

Hutch blinked furiously and his eyes filled with tears, which started to spill over. He brushed them away.

“Starsky’s alive?” he whispered, unable to believe what he was being told.

“Yes. You want to go see him?”

Hutch nodded and the doctor peered out of the door and waved to the nurse to come in with the wheelchair.

“Detective Hutchinson, do you think you can get yourself up and into the chair?”

Hutch nodded and very slowly swung his legs out of the bed and then placed his feet on the floor. He wobbled slightly but then walked the couple of steps he needed to and sat down. The nurse made sure his feet were safely on the footplate and then pushed him towards the door.

Doctor Edson held the door open for them and said, “I’ll see Detective Hutchinson when he gets back. I think if he isn’t too exhausted by the meeting with his partner, continues to improve and respond normally afterwards then I can release him into your care tomorrow.”

“Thank you, Doctor.”

Dobey nodded to him and then hurried to catch up with the nurse and Hutch.

*****

Starsky looked eagerly at the door as it opened. He was so pleased to see Hutch! But a second later, his face filled with worry. Hutch was staring vacantly at the ground in front of him. Starsky tried to sit up a little.

“Hey…Hey buddy, am I glad to see you!”

His voice was still raspy but it was still recognisable as Starsky’s voice. Even so, Hutch didn’t respond.

Dobey placed a hand on Hutch’s shoulder and spoke to him gently: “Hutch? There’s someone here you will want to see.”

Hutch slowly raised his head and looked at Dobey. Dobey pointed behind him and Hutch shifted his focus. He just stared for what seemed like a very long time. The he closed his eyes and opened them again.

“Yeah, you’re not seeing things, it’s me. I’m still here, pal.”

Hutch started trembling. Concerned, Dobey squeezed his shoulder.

“Bring him closer,” Starsky asked, a tremble running through his own voice.

Dobey pushed the chair until Hutch was close enough for Starsky to reach out to. He held out a hand to his partner and waited. Hutch stared at him as if he was sure he was hallucinating.

“Hutch, I’m okay. Take my hand.”

Hutch swallowed and then reached out to take Starsky’s hand. He stared at their joined hands as if he still couldn’t trust his senses. Then suddenly he covered his face with his free hand and started sobbing. As Dobey left the room, Starsky tried to comfort his partner by rubbing his shoulder and making soothing noises. The sobs very slowly quietened over a period of a few minutes.

Starsky started to tire and had to drop his hand and lean back to catch his breath. Registering his partner’s movement and exhausted sigh, Hutch wiped his face and looked up anxiously.

“Starsk, you okay? Sorry, I-”

“-Ssh, I’m the one who’s sorry. For putting you through this.”

Starsky grabbed Hutch’s hand again and squeezed firmly. “We’re both gonna be okay…eventually.”

Hutch looked at him with the tiniest bit of hope.

“Hutch, you believe it? You believe I’m gonna make it? You’d better ‘cause I’m going to need your help to get back to where I want to be.”

Hutch swallowed and nodded. “I’ll be right by your side every step of the way. All day every day, whatever it takes.”

Starsky smiled but shook his head. Hutch looked at him inquiringly.

“Every step of the way, yes. All day, every day, no. When I sleep, you go and sleep. And start eating that healthy junk again, would ya? You’ve lost weight. You ain’t gonna be much use to me if you’re going to faint easy.”

Hutch rallied a little of his usual outrage. “When have I ever fainted easily?”

Starsky just chuckled and for the first time in days Hutch smiled a wide, hopeful, happy smile.

“Good to see you, partner,” Starsky said.

Unable to speak for fear of welling up again, Hutch just squeezed Starsky’s hand.

*****

Much later that afternoon, Hutch was back in his room and not very happy about it. He’d only gone along with the nurse’s insistence that he needed to go back and rest when Starsky insisted too and added that he was tired out and needed to get some sleep. Hutch was wondering how long it would be before he would be allowed to go home when the door opened and he saw Rosie and her father coming in. He smiled at both of them.

“Uncle Ken, you’re better!” Rosie said with delight as she ran across the room and clambered up onto the bed.

Before Dobey could try to stop her, Hutch nodded to him and then pulled Rosie up beside him.

“Hello, darling. Thank you for coming to see me.”

Rosie slipped her arms around his neck and hugged him then sat back.

“I’m so glad you are feeling better. You look like you again.”

“I feel like me again. I’m sorry I worried you this morning.”

Rosie shook her head. “That’s okay. You couldn’t help it. You were worried about Uncle Dave and really, really tired.”

Hutch nodded.

“How’s Uncle Dave? Can I go see him?”

“Well, he’s sleeping now, sweetheart. But maybe you could visit him at the end of the week? I know. Why don’t I come around and collect you and we can visit him together?…Maybe we could take him some ice cream and share it,” he stage-whispered.

Rosie giggled and nodded as her father pretended not to hear.

“Oh yes, I’d like that.”

“Good.”

Dobey cleared his throat before saying, “Glad to see you looking rested, but we won’t stay long. We don’t want to wear you out.”

Hutch shook his head. “You won’t. I’m bored out of my mind. How about we see if there are any cartoons to watch? Just don’t tell Starsky, we’re in here watching ‘toons or he’ll be jealous.”

Rosie giggled again and Dobey smiled. He went and turned the TV on and changed the channel until he found some cartoons. Then he sat down beside Hutch.

Without looking away from the screen, he said quietly, “Glad you’re back with us. You had me worried.”

“I had me worried,” Hutch said. “I thought that he wasn’t…”

Dobey nodded. “Me too. Can’t tell you how happy I am.”

Hutch looked over at his captain, who was still studiously avoiding looking at him. “I’m grateful that Starsky’s going to be okay, but I know he’s got a long battle ahead.”

Dobey nodded. “He has, but he’ll make it because he won’t be doing it alone. Whatever you need, Hutch, the both of you, we’ll work it out. Let us help. Don’t try to do everything yourself.”

“Thank you…The other thing I’m very grateful for is you and your family.”

Dobey cleared his throat again and then said softly, “Our family, Hutch. Our family.”

Hutch swallowed and blinked back tears. He knew there was long road ahead of his partner but with the help of friends like Huggy and the Dobey family…his family…he had hope that Starsky was going to make a good recovery and that the future would be filled with the hope and blessings of friends and family.