Fall Colours

Starsky tries to think of a way to support Hutch as he deals with his loss.

The squad room was quiet. The silence punctuated by the sound of typing and sighing. Both of these noises were coming from Hutch. Starsky, who was pouring coffee, glanced over at his friend with concern. He knew Hutch was struggling to concentrate and couldn’t blame him. It was only days since Hutch’s heart had been broken.

“Broken? Too tame a word,” Starsky thought. “Try; torn out of his chest, trampled on and then crushed.”

He carefully carried the two full mugs of coffee over to their desks and silently put one in front of his partner, who gave him a small nod and then continued typing. Starsky sat down and tried to get on with his own report but his mind was distracted by worry and care for his partner. It was Friday and the prospect of a free weekend should be cause for joy but Starsky knew that, under the circumstances, time would weigh heavy for his friend. Everything that had brought light into his life had been snuffed out when Gillian was murdered. Starsky wanted to help, but didn’t know how.

At last, the reports were done and on Dobey’s desk and it was time for them to head out. They put on their jackets and headed silently out to the car. Things were okay between them; they had long since sorted through what Starsky had tried to do to protect Hutch once he found out what Gillian did for living. It was just Hutch was exhausted by his loss, struggling to get through each day; he had no energy for their usual conversation or banter. Starsky understood but it didn’t stop him from missing it and wishing he could find a way to give Hutch some comfort.

“Hey buddy, what do you feel like doing tomorrow?” Starsky asked, as he drove them both towards Hutch’s place.

Hutch shrugged. “I wasn’t planning on doing anything…other than catching up on some sleep.”

“Well, you could sleep in and then I could come over and we could go to the movies or the beach. Whatever you like.”

Hutch’s hand squeezed Starsky’s shoulder as he said quietly, “I’m okay. You don’t have to babysit me. I’ll get some rest and just do my own thing.”

Starsky wanted to protest but knew if he pushed too hard Hutch would be even more obstinate then usual and he’d get nowhere.

“All right. Call me if you get bored.”

Hutch nodded.

Starsky dropped his partner off and headed home, still thinking about how he could support his partner whilst also giving him space.

*****

On Saturday evening, Starsky rang Hutch on the pretext of checking who would be collecting who on Monday morning. He was uneasy when Hutch told him that he hadn’t done anything all day, not even gone for his usual run. Starsky offered to come over the next day to keep Hutch company but Hutch declined. Starsky thought hard and had suddenly an idea.

On Sunday morning, Starsky packed a picnic basket and thermos flask and drove over to Hutch’s. By nine a.m., he was knocking on Hutch’s door. When Hutch didn’t answer, he knocked again and then let himself in. A sleepy-looking Hutch was just stumbling out of the bedroom.

“Morning, Blondie. Get dressed and bring your hiking boots. We’re going out.”

“What? What are you talking about?” Hutch yawned.

“I figure if we leave now, we’ve got time to drive up into the San Gabriel Mountains and do some hiking. I want to take some photos of the Fall colours and you’re coming with me.”

“I don’t feel like it. You go. Enjoy yourself.”

Starsky pouted. “You’d leave me to face whatever wild animals there might be all alone?”

“Stay on the main tracks, you’ll be fine.”

“What if I get lost and can’t find my way back to my car?”

“Stick to a path and don’t wander. You can borrow my compass if you like.”

Starsky opened his mouth, trying to think of another reason why he needed Hutch along, then shut it again. He flopped down onto the couch.

“What are you doing?” Hutch asked.

Starsky sighed and shrugged. “Staying put.”

“But I thought you wanted to see the Fall colours?”

“I do but it would be more fun with your company.”

“Oh.”

“Never mind. Another time maybe…It’s just I remembered last year you mentioned wanting to go see the Fall colours and we never made it. I figured you might want to go.”

Hutch remembered the conversation. Starsky could see his friend deliberating.

“Did I mention I made a picnic and thermos of coffee?”

Hutch let out a long sigh and then said, “I’ll get dressed.”

Starsky grinned with pleasure. “Hey, that’s great.”

“Well, I wouldn’t be much of a partner if I let you go off alone to the wilderness given your track record.”

“Our track record,” Starsky protested.

Hutch almost managed a grin.

*****

Three hours later, they were sitting side by side on a fallen tree, admiring the view across the forest. A rich patchwork quilt of autumnal colours was spread out before them.

“Wow! Beautiful!” Starsky said. “I’m glad we came.”

Hutch nodded. “I’m glad you dragged me out. This is so beautiful. Soothing.”

“The changing leaves speak to my mind: of change, of rest, of slowing time. The colours blaze and fade too soon, but in my heart they’ll linger on.”

“That’s beautiful, Starsk. Who wrote that?”

“I don’t remember.”

Starsky hesitated. He wanted to say that for some reason it reminded him of Gillian but he wasn’t sure he could express it in a way that would make sense to his partner. But he should have known that his partner would pick up on what he didn’t say.

“Kinda reminds me of Gillian…”

Starsky nodded. As he heard Hutch swallow, he eased an arm around his shoulder and gave him a quick hug.

Hutch blew his nose and then nodded. “How about that coffee you promised me?”

Starsky grinned and was soon pouring two cups of steaming coffee into two tin cups. As Hutch sipped on his drink, Starsky opened up the picnic basket and offered food items.

“Twinkie, salami or pickles?”

Hutch pulled a face. “I knew I should have brought my own food!”

Starsky chuckled and produced a sandwich. Hutch looked at it suspiciously.

“It’s okay. It’s chicken and mayo, just as boring as can be.”

“Thanks.”

Starsky pulled out a sandwich dripping with things Hutch didn’t even want to name and the two of them munched contentedly, while still looking at the beautiful view.

“We’ll have to make this an annual trip,” Starsky suggested.

Hutch nodded. “I’d like that. I’d like that very much.”