The Fine Line Between Love and Hate, AKA Hutch and the Striped Tomato

Hutch hated the Torino with his heart and soul, but mostly with his back…

Flash fic, written for the prompt “Starsky/Hutch, Hutch hated the Torino with his heart and soul, but mostly with his back…”

It was not an exaggeration to say that Hutch hated the Torino. That god-awful striped tomato with its red and white paint job—

(“Candy apple red,” Starsky’s voice in his head corrected, and didn’t he hate that, too?)

—was undeniably one of the most conspicuous things rolling on Bay City’s streets. This was not, despite all of Starsky’s arguments to the contrary, a good thing.

It was, frankly, an absurd car for a couple of plainclothes (and sometimes undercover) cops to be driving around in, and Hutch occasionally wondered whether Starsky had applied bribery or blackmail to get their captain to okay its use. Then again, his partner’s puppy dog eyes were surprisingly persuasive. Perhaps even Dobey wasn’t immune to their power; Hutch certainly wasn’t, much to his private chagrin.

(An “aw, c’mon Hutch…” plus that look was ridiculously persuasive. The bastard.)

Still, the Torino’s drawbacks went beyond its gaudy appearance. The damn thing was loud. It guzzled gas. It ran, as Hutch bluntly told Starsky once, like a rock in a washer. It also meant Starsky would only entrust the maintenance of his baby to Merl the Earl—

(“He’s a genius, Hutch!” Right.)

—a mechanic who, as far as Hutch was concerned, put the high in high maintenance. He didn’t think he would ever forget, much less forgive, the unsolicited and unwelcome accessorizing Merl had once done on his car.

(“It’ll be the same old heap that you love so well.” Right.)

So yeah, Hutch hated the Torino, heart and soul. He hated it almost as much as Starsky loved the stupid thing. Almost.

You see, despite everything, Starsky really loved that car. Starsky also really, really loved Hutch.

And sometimes, Starsky really, really loved Hutch… in the car.

(“Back seat, babe. Now.”)

And Hutch… well. He couldn’t truly complain about that, could he?

But man, his back sure did.

Chapter End Notes:

The lovely themusecalliope recorded a podfic of this story; it can be found here.

Originally published: 2012